Sigh. We're a few weeks from having to supplement with formula. This makes me so sad, but the reality is that Will eats more breastmilk than I produce, and our frozen supply is beginning to dwindle.
If you recall, I've been pumping full-time since Will was 3 weeks old. This is terribly difficult, but I think breastmilk is so important. At first, I made more milk than Will needed to eat, so we were able to freeze a fair amount. But my supply has started to dip, and we've been using frozen milk nearly every day for the past month. I only have 21 ounces of frozen milk remaining (we had nearly 3 times that at one point), so Will will probably have his first taste of formula before Christmas.
I found an organic formula that I like (Earth's Best), but it's just not as good as breastmilk. Supplementing with formula is really hard for me to swallow (pun intended), but we weren't very good at nursing and the pump simply can't maintain my supply like a suckling baby can. I will pump as long as my body wants to make milk, so it's not that he won't be getting any breastmilk. But I believe in the importance of exclusive breastfeeding for the first six months, and I'm bummed we won't make it.
I'm trying to remember that any breastmilk is better than no breastmilk, and four months of exclusive feeding is a darn long time. But still, I'm disappointed.
Will will love you no matter what. He doesn't care if he drinks breastmilk or formula - he only cares that you are there to hold him and play with him and help him navigate the world.
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